Nausea Mechanics!

Posted: January 27, 2015 in Tim Braun
Tags: , , , , ,

I’m working on a series of blogs to detail my cruise experiences last week, but I was thrilled to come sailing home and get back in touch with the connected world.  First actlogoion is always to update all of the non-updated apps on the trusty iPad.  I accessed the Updates – and was greeted with what I like to think was a little bit of fantastic news:

RollerCoaster Tycoon:

A new update with a bunch of new features and improvements is now available. For the first time, your peeps can now…. PUKE! Relive the glory of RCTs past with brand-new nausea mechanics!

I mean – how can you NOT be excited by that!??! No longer do I have to worry if my peeps can handle the ride of their roller coasting lives. I’ll see the vomit-likely rating for each peep by this adorable use of a nauseous emoticon in their updated app:

SickFace

You may be laughing, but adding this feature adds to the complexity and realism of the game. I love vomit and you should too. The only thing I worry about is the poor chap that got this task on his ‘Video Game Developers’ task list.

  1. Add laser-guided halon bullets with high-tech energy rating and fully-enabled latch mechanism to Game #1
  2. Add alien-inspired monster level with secret hatch to Hall of Doom and a feature-rich boss level to Game #2
  3. Add new asphalt race track with increased physics to handle exactly like a Formula 1 car to Game #3
  4. Add vomit to Game #4

Actually – if you think about it we are ALL adding vomit to our regularly scheduled jobs. That’s why we go in every single day and work for the man – to ensure that our nausea mechanics are up to date.

My deep thought for the week. Cruise review coming soon!

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Comments
  1. writerinsoul says:

    Now I don’t play this or any game but it seems they’re being short-sighted; perhaps they could include the booths selling hot dogs, cotton candy, meat-on-sticks, jumbo soft drinks, and deep-fried *whatevers* as well. (For the authentic puking experience.)

    Liked by 1 person

    • They already have all of those. Which is why they needed a vomit factor. I neglected to mention that to HELP the great unwashed with their nausea, you also have to build first aid stations, janitors workshops, and trash cans. This is gonna be one smelly park.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. okay, between a previous posting dealing with spit and now this one dealing with vomit, I am not sure where you are going sometimes. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. publikworks says:

    Terrific blog!

    Have you gotten enough of the snow you wanted? Or would you like more?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Carrie Rubin says:

    And now I know what I’m missing out on by not playing these phone games…

    Hope you escaped your cruise without getting vomited on!

    Liked by 1 person

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