The Best (Worst) Job in the World

Posted: June 30, 2015 in Tim Braun
Tags: , , , , ,

Recently my lovely daughter completed her schooling, collegiately-speaking. We are very proud of her obviously and wish her all the best in her star-studded future. However, this otherwise joyous experience has started the equally painful job search process for said daughter. Pausing to reflect upon my vast litany of jobs in the past, I have come to the conclusion that what may have LOOKED like a perfect job in the past may not actually be so. I now present to you possibly the worst job in the world (and no, luckily I have NOT had this job).

Oh sure, it may LOOK like fun. Let’s examine what the possible job advertisement for this position would look like.

job

Now THAT is a job we should be applying for, right? Great location – San Francisco. Great company to work for – they even TELL you that it’s a great company to work for. Great experience and it fulfills all of your high hopes and warm desires. Apply faster than immediately!

Here’s the thing. This actually may be the worst job in the world – because it’s really an example of what might possibly be an ad to do THIS:

n&a

No, not to BE on the show….or even to really WORK on the show. What this position really entails is that you sit through HOURS and HOURS of raw video of two naked people trying to survive in horrendously horrible outdoor conditions. They are naked. AND afraid. AND disgusting. However, you can’t really call a show ‘NAKED & DISGUSTING’ and expect many viewers. Well…. actually you might get more viewers, but I’ll have to do a thorough survey to find out. Which I will never do.

So you sit there and watch these two people for 21 days of video and YOUR job? To make sure that all of the private parts are sufficiently covered for television. An example from the show:

blur

That’s right – that is your ONLY job. You have sat through 16 years of schooling and you have obtained a job with the Discovery Channel. You walk in the first day, get sat in front of a crusty old 15” computer monitor, and told that whenever you see private parts, to make sure that they get blurred out. This may SOUND like a dream job to some for the first 13 minutes – but then everything begins to take the shape of a hamburger or a hair brush and it just loses every single ounce of interest.

Life lesson – make sure you ask exactly what the job is before you hit the ‘ACCEPT’ button in the back of your head. It may not be all it’s ‘cracked’ up to be.

See what I did there?

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Comments
  1. I have never heard the description of “begins to take the shape of a hamburger or a hair brush” to describe genitalia 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I will never, ever, ever understand a culture that has a show about naked people – that’s explicitly focuses on the fact that they’re NAKED – that then insists they not have any genitalia. This is more bewildering to me than the fact that such a show would exist in the first place. Seriously, who watches these things? I looked it up on Google and admit I was transfixed for a while … but seriously … to sit down for an hour, or whatever, every single week? WHY???

    Liked by 2 people

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