Posts Tagged ‘humor’

Suffice it to say that I don’t understand a lot of life’s things. I realize that’s a ridiculously broad statement, but I have a ridiculously broad range of things that I don’t understand. Every day I walk casually through the path of life trying to make sense of what I’m seeing, hearing, tasting, touching and experiencing. There are those that would wax poetic about this and say that what I’m doing is exploring the human condition.

Not me. To me it’s just that I’m walking down the aforementioned pathway permanently confused. On to a few specific examples of things that are currently causing my brain to bend.


The subject of people’s parking woes could take up a month-worth of blogs, but I’ll just focus on one aspect of parking – the pull-through. Basically, you should 100% ALWAYS utilize the pull-through. I asked an esteemed group of car-driving panelists (i.e. my kids) why you wouldn’t pull through and the only reason they came up with was if you are going to be loading something in the trunk and didn’t want to be blocked in.

Fair enough.

But explain this picture to me:

Unless all of these lemmings were planning on loading a ton of stuff from Pier 1 Imports into their trunk (and since Pier 1 is basically the store where you go in and either buy nothing or a 5” fake potted plant, the odds of that are approximately zero) there is absolutely NO reason why any of these folks shouldn’t have pulled all the way through. Of course when they departed the space they pulled straight forward to get out of the spaces. Don’t throw the old ‘Maybe there was someone there when they pulled in…’ crap at me either – I was there for when two of them lined up with their annoying brethren and walked into the store.


Around my wonderful neighborhood, I am quick to notice odd peculiarities that arise from time to time. Recently at a nearby house the following sign appeared. NOTE: There was no fanfare, no brass bands, and no confetti:

What makes this sign even stranger is that it’s basically in the middle of a normal field. There is a slight ditch running through the yard, but it expels no odor or brown liquid that I’ve ever noticed:

Before we analyze the sign itself, can we just take a moment to note the irony of a little bird sitting on top of the sign? Not to mention the extremely brilliant photography and timing – a bird sitting and basically mocking the meaning of the sign speaks volumes. There are photographers that sit in jungles and wait for the perfect shot for months – I did it completely by accident and didn’t even notice it until I looked at the shot on the computer. Bringing the art to you is what I’m doing here.

OK, so what the heck does the sign mean? I’ve not noticed a humanity rush to get to this ditch to go and get their drink on – sewage effluent or not. In what world is a sign necessary to stop you from going into your neighbor’s yard and drinking any random liquid that is bubbling out of the ground? Why can’t the company mentioned STOP the pipe from being able to be drank from? Drunk from? Drinked from? Anyway, bury the damn pipe and get the sign out of the yard. How about that.


We’ve all seen those 6-minute long commercials advertising some unknown medicine that will do wonderful things to some part of your body. I obviously skip these or ignore these the vast majority of the time, but this one portion of the commercial caught my eye:

I don’t know what Cosentyx does or what it’s for, but I’m for damn sure not going to take it if I’m allergic to it. Is this what our world has come to? That we have to specifically tell the stupid people out there that if they are allergic to something don’t take it? I realize my doctor got her degree at the University of Northern Wales End Land Liberty (UNWELL) but I still wouldn’t expect her to give me something that I know I’m allergic to. Maybe I’m just an idealist over here.

More coming…obviously….since I’m never not confused.